Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Randomize
