dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
