dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
the liver wants what the liver wants
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
