Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
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