im holly from the hills drunk
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Randomize
