I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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