My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
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