He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
