i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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