My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Randomize
