i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
