More tranny stories later!
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
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