that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
