All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
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