I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
