This girl is more easily done than said...
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
Randomize
