This girl is more easily done than said...
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
I want to fling myself into the sun
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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