Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize
