mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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