I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize