I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
