I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
