What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Randomize
