shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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