dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
