ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
