bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Help me help you realize you are a moron
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
