You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Randomize
