Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
So squirting runs in the family.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Text me some of your sweat
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