she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
