I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize
