normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
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