I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Randomize
