we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
Randomize
