If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Randomize
