pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
Randomize
