Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Randomize
