Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
