it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
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