everyone is single if you try hard enough
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize