Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
