How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Randomize