I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
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