HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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