Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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