Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
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