Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Randomize
