Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Randomize
