Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
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