Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
