i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
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