Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Randomize
